for future reference.

okay boys, listen close. we're going to play a little pretending game.

close your eyes, take a deep breath [then open your eyes to continue to read], and imagine your pretend girlfriend is giving you a present. alright. open said present and observe that it is an inside joke with you two - a t-shirt that says 'world's 2nd greatest guy'. again, an inside joke. it sounded more humorous than world's greatest guy to you both. okay, got that? now flash forward a year [god, has it really been that long?]; you and pretend girlfriend have broken up, presumably fairly amiably. you have a new girlfriend, she has a new boyfriend.

let's say one night you're doing laundry, and you come across the shirt you received oh-so long ago.

here's what NOT to send her over the internet:
"i found that shirt you gave me, and i realized that the shirt marked the moment our relationship was going nowhere. it was a joke the i was number 2 but thats like a metaphor for me never being good enough and that id never be the best doesnt mean you didnt like me or we didnt have a good time but...., just a idea last night when doing luandry"

it's not pleasant to wake up to.

just... don't do it.

promise?

thanks.